Stop Being a Control Freak
The one thing over which we can always have control is ourselves. It is possible, and desirable, to control our attitudes, reactions, beliefs, and behavior. Trying to control the outcome of a situation is not helpful. You can do everything within your power to create the outcome you desire.You can take positive physical steps to achieve a result. You can use affirmations to increase your magnetism to success. You can adjust your thoughts and your beliefs to encourage positive outcomes, but you mostly cannot make life follow your plans.
The same goes for trying to control other people. At times it may seem to be possible to manipulate and dominate others. This is not healthy for either the person ‘in control’ or the one being controlled. It will not create positive results for either person, and it is only a matter of time before the one being controlled gets fed up and either breaks away or becomes resentful and passive aggressive (showing aggression in subtle, underhanded ways). Instead of trying to control the behavior of a partner or someone else in your life, focus on controlling how you respond to them. If you are unhappy with the way your partner is treating you, you can choose to respond to them calmly and firmly.
This is much healthier, and more effective, than trying to manipulate or control them with threats, tears, or nastiness. And while you can’t control the behavior of another person, you can certainly model an example of how you would like them to behave. If you want your partner to be thoughtful and respectful to you, make sure that you are showing them respect and consideration.
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21.05.2010
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